To Be Brave Is To Live

“Bravery is not a quality of the body. It is of the soul.” – Mahatma Gandhi

What do you think of when you hear the word brave? I’m sure an image of a soldier forging on in battle, or a hero rescuing a civilian from a peculiar situation, is what immediately comes to mind. No one ever thinks of the boy who sits in the back of the class and says nothing but still shows up every day, or the girl on the basketball team who is constantly berated by teammates and coaches but still finds the strength to come to each game. We all have the misconception that to be brave you must be saving someone else in some way, but to be brave is to get out of bed in the morning when all you want to do is lie there and forget the world, to interact with people when all you want to do is stay home, to continue living when all you want to do is die.

Almost everyone is tired in the morning. We would all just like to roll over and hit snooze about eight times before waking up. For some people, though, it’s much more than simply being tired in the morning. There are people who struggle every day with their own mental negativity (not by their own accord). At the end of each day they aren’t tired, they are exhausted, not “I just ran ten miles” exhausted, the mental exhaustion that comes from living everyday battling their own demons and the harsh realities of the world around them. When they wake up in the morning, they know that they are going to have to face all of these things again. Sleep is just a break from it all. It does not “recharge” them like it does for those not going through this, so when they wake up in the morning, they are still exhausted. Yet, everyday there they are smiling and laughing at school, or work, so you don’t suspect a thing. When tomorrow comes, they will wake up and do it all again, not because they want to but because they have no other choice, because to them giving up would be brave.

Sonder is the realization that every person you come into contact with has their own story. Each person is dealing with their own troubles and triumphs. The friends who are drowning in their own mental negativity (not by their own accord) and still take the time to talk out your problems with you and find solutions, the friends who don’t have the energy to do their own homework but will come over at 10pm to help you with Calculus, the friends who really want to stay home with Netflix, but instead accompany you to the mall because they know it’s your favorite place, they are the friends who would like nothing more than to stay home and avoid all social interaction. They are the friends who cringe at the idea of small talk and meeting new people, or even seeing old friends, but every single day go to school, or work, and live their “mundane” lives. They force a smile and nod their head during small talk, they laugh when they should and at the end of the day although they didn’t seem to exert much energy those few social interactions have drained them completely. These people believe that they must live this way, that they must grin and bear it, because they think they are cowards. To them it is cowardly to continue living.

Each person being dragged down by their own mental negativity (again not by their own accord) has themselves convinced that they are a bad person and they deserve what they are going through, but they don’t believe that anyone else deserves to go through the same thing. They do all they can to survive so they can help that “just one person” because maybe if they make a difference that will give their life some sort of meaning. They will smile and start a conversation with a stranger if they look sad. According to them “no one should ever be sad” though they constantly are. They are the people who will gladly save someone before they save themselves. While they have a hard time convincing it of themselves, they know that every life has inherent worth and dignity. They are the heroes that don’t ask for any recognition because to them they aren’t. They are just some sad kid on the street trying to help out, in search of some meaning for life.

The one thing all of these people have in common is their will to live struggling against their want to die. They each struggle every day to find it in them to want to live. They feel weak and ashamed because they pretend to be happy but all they truly want is to die. They feel like cowards because they “don’t have the courage” to kill themselves. What none of these people realize is that it is not cowardly to look death in the eye and say “NO!” because you are afraid. It is, in fact, one of the most courageous things a person can do.

We all think we know what it means to be brave, but what we don’t realize is that bravery is not limited to reckless acts of self endangerment. Bravery comes from living your everyday life and not letting the darkness overcome you. To be brave is not to save lives, to be brave is to live.